July 2014.
This time last year I was sad.
I'm still pretty sad.
Things have taken a weird turn and I don't know if I like it. I should be happy. But I'm not happy.

Jason jest znów w moim życiu. Znaczy, zawsze był ale teraz jest przy mnie, może nie w tym momencie ale jest. Choć nie wiem czy go chcę tak jak kiedyś. Chcę mu pierw pomóc, wtedy zobaczyć co się stanie. Kocham go ale chyba nie jestem w nim już zakochana.

I really thought that I wanted you, or thought you were going to be the one. I have spent so many years, so much of my love and my time dedicating myself to you. To wanting to restore your view on forever. To show you that anyone can love, but it takes true courage when it comes to really meaning it. And for awhile there, I really thought I meant it. But then one morning, I woke up to find you next to me, and then finding myself wishing you werent there, and that I was alone, and you were somewhere with someone who actually wanted to see your true self in the morning light. And thats when I knew that I was really over this, finally over you. When I felt the feeling of wanting you to be with someone who actually wanted this just as much as you do.